Random musings from the front line (well, more like the support trench, or perhaps the castle 10 miles away, supping Chateau Lafite with the General Staff) in the battle for curiosity, inertia, grammar and a Dachshund called Colin.

Saturday, January 21, 2006

Cruisin'

Mmmmmmmmm. Love that taste. Click HERE to see certain South Park episode

There's always been gay rumours about diminutive cult-following actor Tom Cruise, as if anyone these days outside of the Leviticus-tastic US Bible Belt (who are hardly avid viewers of his movies anyway) gives a shit about that sort of thing. The odd thing is that they persist in spite of lawsuits, lack of pictures, a couple of children (I think?) and a succession of marriages. If I were a gay Hollywood actor trying to keep my sexuality quiet (and I'm NOT saying he is), the last thing I'd do is threaten a cartoon series with legal action for broadcasting a series of thinly-veiled double entendres about a plotline that involved me hiding in a child's bedroom wardrobe.

But that's apparently exactly what Tom Cruise (an odd choice of surname given the connotations of the word, and the fact that he was born Thomas Mapother) has done with an episode of South Park, allegedly threatening to sue any British TV Channel that broadcasts the latest installment of the scatological Colorado-based cartoon series. In the hilarious offending scene, Tom Cruise locks himself in Stan's closet after his acting "skills" are compared unfavourably with those of Leonardo di Caprio. What follows is that various people, including Nicole Kidman, fellow loony Scientologist John Travolta and a gun-wielding R Kelly, appearing in Stan's bedroom and begging him to "come out of the closet" no fewer than 28 times. It's VERY funny, and thanks to the lovely Smit from www.smithappens.com, you can view a clip from the episode by clicking the dodgy photo above, or just here. Enjoy!

8 Rants & Replies:

Blogger Fuckkit said...

I despise this man, he reminds me of a Jack Russell. Short, stroppy and won't shut the fook up!

3:31 pm, January 21, 2006

 
Blogger Merkin said...

But he's SUCH a good actor, though, how can you say that?

*cough*

2:06 pm, January 22, 2006

 
Blogger WordWhiz said...

I didn't know that about Tom's Cruise's name change. Interesting. As far as his sexual preference, eh...who cares? I'm so disinterested in the hollywood stuff.

9:19 pm, January 22, 2006

 
Blogger The Lady Muck said...

Hehe I love that episode! I was singing that shite r kelly snippet for days thou!
I hope he loses dammit, after all the toss he's made cinema audiences sit through he really should be more tolerant! LOLtp

11:55 pm, January 22, 2006

 
Blogger Wyndham said...

Tom has hilariously lost his mind over the last 12 months which has been most amusing. When Control Freaks Unravel.

2:42 pm, January 23, 2006

 
Blogger Kyahgirl said...

don't follow his story too closley because he's a bit of a freak but I think he really turned the public against himself (here anyway) when he did the crazed monkey thing on the Ophrah show. too strange.

8:34 pm, January 23, 2006

 
Blogger Urban Chick said...

you would seek to question mr cruise's raging heterosexuality??

*tuts*

9:45 pm, January 27, 2006

 
Blogger garfer said...

Tom Cruise can't act. He just runs around SHOUTING.

Death to all short arse actors.

8:28 pm, January 28, 2006

 

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